For several weeks now I have had a restless feeling. Nothing is wrong, but something's just not quite right. I just can't seem to be satisfied, but I don't know why. Then today I came across a beautiful prayer by St. Augustine. Now, I must admit, I do not have the foggiest idea of who St. Augustine is, but I very much love the prayer he is known for. This is it:
Let us pray (in silence) that we may grow in union with the One who fulfills our heart's desire.
Almighty God, you have made us for yourself, and our hearts are restless till they find their rest in you; so lead us by your Spirit that in this life we may live to your glory and in the life to come enjoy you for ever; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
To add to the revelation I received today, I remembered (and have been meditating on) Pastor Doug's message at church yesterday about being silent in the presence of God...and listening for the still small voice. He referenced 1 Kings 19:11-13, a wonderful passage that I have read many times and thought how profound to know that in all the chaos that surrounded Elijah, the still small voice of God was still there.
Could it be that my restlessness has been the still small voice of God drawing me to be in His presence? To sit quietly before Him and soak in the beauty of His holiness? Last night and today, I have purposefully made myself sit in the quiet for a few moments here and there. Just the thought of resting in the perfect peace of God is enough to make my heart relax and enjoy the quiet moment. I remember, even as a child, I felt a need to pray and be close to God. It was a little scary as a child to think of being in the presence of the Almighty God. Now days it's a much different experience. It's like a tall glass of ice water after being out in the heat. It's like putting my feet up after a long exhausting day. It truly feels like perfect rest, for a restless heart.
Thank you Lord for whispering in my hear and tugging on my heart. I pray that I will always be able to hear the still small voice of God leading me to a place of rest.
Psalm 23:2 ....He leads me beside still waters...